After fighting at home over being asked to help out after dinner by wiping kitchen counters, a mother asked that we process this in my office. My young client believed this job should be optional, not required, because he can earn money doing it. I listened, validated his perspective, asked questions about meals and found his understanding limited.
We created a fun activity to experientially teach the need for teamwork with meals. We planned a meal that he would be responsible for all. His parents would be his helpers, but he was in charge of each aspect.
Afterward, he said he really learned how much work it is to prepare, serve and clean up a meal! His perspective completely changed and he realizes why helping wipe the counters sometimes really matters. Success!
Here are the parameters of the ‘game’ we created.
We planned the meal in my office. He wanted hamburgers. It had to have vegetables, which was a struggle, but we settled on some. To help keep enthusiasm, we also agreed on a dessert, which would occur after the dishes were done. It was root beer floats.
We identified (with mom) what groceries needed to be purchased. He had to go to the store to get the groceries. Mom could be his helper doing what he asked, as long as he was the main person doing it. He was to pay for the groceries, with mom’s money, to have a sense of the cost and the process.
Mom would help create a timeline of what had to be prepared in what order for the food to be ready at the same time. We discussed what happens if it’s not thought through.
Set out all ingredients and utensils needed before starting.
Cooking the meal happened! No one did more work than him, but he had the help he needed to pull it off. He was to serve the meal as well.
All clean up had to be done, from clearing the table, to wiping the counters and sweeping the floor. Again, no one worked more than he did, but he had the help needed through out. Encouragement along the way was essential.
Dessert of his choosing, with him doing the work of making the root beer floats. Again a lot of work.
Encouragement and fun were foremost in order to keep motivation and learning happening. There were so many lessons learned though this exercise. Confidence was increased and understanding was build. Complaining and fussing were decreased! There will be more of these events in the summer months to build skills of independence as well.
Have fun!
